Indika

Horror media has always been really special to me. Finding media that have the ability to make me uncomfortable while keeping me engaged with their media is something I can’t help but love. Not every subgenre of horror makes me feel this way, but the genres that do are ones that can almost always make me acknowledge them. One of these many subgenres is existential horror. 

Existential horror is a subgenre of horror that uses my own ability to have ideas against me, and that is something I find absolutely terrifying. Weaponizing my own mind into self torture due to my understanding of existence isn’t something that is easy to pull off, but when done correctly it can torment me for days on end. As a conscious being, I am constantly acknowledging myself and what I produce into the world, be it physical or non physical products, but rarely do I question my own existence. These questions often lead me into a spiral of trying to understand why I exist, if my existence matters, and if the freedom I have is actually my own. There may not be a right or wrong answer to these existential questions, but the discussion they create is one I find fascinating and horrifying. 

If I had to recommend an example of great existential horror done in media I would recommend a third person adventure-horror game named after its main character, Indika. This is a game I offhandedly came across that I am convinced the universe wanted me to play. The driving force of this game is the discussion of self existence, and its brought about with a religious lens. During this game I got to play as Indika, a nun that didn’t make the decision to be one, as she adventures with a criminal in need of help. As we adventured many conversations occurred covering topics bathed in existentialism. There may be no actual jump scares, tension building, or scary monsters in this game, but the questions posed were much scarier than any of those things could ever be. 

My experience with Indika was anything but perfect. Within the first 20 minutes I knew the gameplay, story tunneling, and puzzles were not for me. This would prove to be correct throughout the rest of my time with the game, but so was another thing I discovered during the intro of this experience. The main question of the game can be found in the first 20 minutes as well, that question being “what’s the point in doing this?”.

At the start of this game Indika is demanded to fill a barrel with water by a nun in a higher position than she, but after filling that barrel the nun throws it all to waste. I immediately found myself wondering if this game would be a waste of my time or not. Only then did I remind myself that everything I’d do in this game is most likely a part of a larger picture(another thought process that led me to my interpretation of the themes). From then on I found that every situation, character conversation, and narration was drenched with the existential conversation Indika is trying to have with its players. 

When having these existential conversations I feel like I’m always a bit more enlightened about myself and my worldview than when I entered the conversation(this comes after the fear of acknowledging existence, freedom, consciousness, etc), and I think that’s what Indika understands so well. The story feels like a coming of age story even with our main character being a grown woman. This feeling is then promoted through childhood flashback levels that seem to mirror Indika's current journey. As we get her coming to a new enlightenment, we reflect on her coming of age story, and we come to understand that she isn’t as grown into being herself as she thought she was. 

The character writing for Indika feels like one of the most interesting self insert characters I’ve come across. At times, I found Indika to be a character surrogate for myself and the creators as well. Whether or not that experience is unique to me, I feel that Indika is a character that almost anyone can relate to. Her struggle with understanding herself, her connection to her faith, controlling her desires, and not feeling satisfied with the life she’s come to are all things I think people can relate to. This resulted in not only Indika coming to be a new person, but I as well. 

Earlier I mentioned that existential horror subgenre is one I hold dear to me, but I only discussed the darkness and harrowing aspects of it that I find interesting about the subgenre. The best part about existential horror is the appreciation and hope for existence it leaves behind once it’s over. Feeling the negative emotions of life gives us the means to love the positive. Having hard discussions often leads to better outcomes. Experiencing fear of our existence gives me love for my own. 

By no means do I consider Indika a perfect game. The pacing is wonky, the gameplay itself isn’t very engaging, and the atmosphere just isn’t as cool as expected, but the game has a lot of heart in it. During my experience of Indika I found one thing I could know for certain. These creators understand what it means to experience existential horror to the point that they could provide an interesting conversation with it. Indika was a great short gaming experience that I would recommend to horror and non horror fans alike.